Managing The Weaponry

…and Laying Down the Law

It was an action-packed weekend. A total of 4 daughters (one by birth, three by stray whose kids call me “Aunt Granny”) one stray son and five semi-grands plus #1 grandson. Here for the youngest semi-grandson’s eighth birthday on Sunday. To make matters worse, the weather was absolutely dismal so there could be no friendly campfire for Peep-roasting, the ins and outs of having all those people coming and going from the cold and wet into the house completely trashed the place so that it’s taken two days just to reclaim the living area.

There were some issues that arose, particularly in regards to the younger boys (8 and 10) and 17-year old #1 grandson’s ample collection of serious weaponry that he just can’t seem to keep put safely away because he practices with them so often. I had to collect ninja knives and Samurai swords, one rapier and several heavy fantasy swords from them at various times, which they’d managed to fish out of some gawd-awful corner of grandson’s outrageously messy room when nobody was looking. The girls (4 and 14) were, as usual, perfect angels - ratted out those boys every time…

#1 Grandson lives here, graduates high school this year, and is an only child. This place is far out in the country with no immediate neighbors, surrounded by National Forest. When he was younger (about 8), we began allowing him to collect wooden practice swords and staffs, gave him form lessons to keep him busy. Our son (who died when grandson was just 2) had a double black belt in a weapons form of Kung-Fu (was also an amazing juggler and seasoned performer who once toured demonstrating his weapons skills on stage with his master). Grandson had inherited a lot of practice and show weapons, bought more once we allowed that beginning when he was 12. He makes spectacularly detailed Samurai armor by hand too, as well as fantasy chess sets from Sculpy - he’s extremely talented, we’ve always encouraged it.

He orders the swords and knives through a mail order company that sends him a catalog every 3 months, and he has amassed quite the collection. We’ve also allowed long bow and crossbow for target practice, and he’s very good at it. The problem is that he doesn’t always put his weapons safely away. When it’s just him it’s not a problem. When there’s little ones present, it IS a problem.

Now, I don’t mind if the younger boys target practice with the long bows. There’s a full dirt-bank target, and so long as there aren’t other kids or dogs in the area, they can’t hurt anything. There’s usually adults or elder grandson around to help keep them in line. The 10-year old has phenomenal aim, has his own bow and a straw target in his own yard and practices regularly. We’ve never allowed play guns that aren’t SuperSoakers or Nerf. No knife fights or sword fights using real weapons. There are well padded PVC and duct tape practice staffs and swords they can hit each other with all day and never leave a bruise.

But because elder grandson didn’t even try to get all his real weapons stashed where the kids couldn’t get them this past weekend, I’ve laid down the law. Summer’s coming, there will be lots of young-uns in and out, he graduates (and has his 18th birthday) in May, and while I understand his teenage distraction and inattention to detail, that distraction is WHY I’m laying down the law.

ALL of the metal weapons must be boxed atop the closet in the shed, where the unicycles, puppets and various impressive implements of snake-death are hung in rafters, in the building where we store the DR brush mower, the super Craftsman tiller, the chainsaws and chains, axes, mauls, pitchforks and other sharp implements that are necessary to keeping the land and crops. When (if?) he ever gets a place of his own, he can use them as steak knives for all I care. But since he’s going to college just 20 miles away, he’ll still be here for awhile. Besides, if he were living on-campus they’d never allow those weapons anyway.

He’s sulking, of course. “It’s so unfair!” he whines, knowing deep down that it’s his own fault. Being responsible with his weapons is a good lesson to learn, as well as remembering that he’s not the only grandkid we’ve got. He is much older than the rest of the brood, will be voting this year! That makes him a legal adult for most purposes, and despite all the distractions he very much needs to pay attention to these things.

Nobody’s perfect. That’s why being a parent and grandparent can still be such a challenge well after that kid gets to be a foot taller than you! The teenage brain is stuck somewhere between childhood and adult, there is still work to do. And, just to add to the observations from this end of the spectrum, they never really do grow up. They’ll always be your babies, so you’ll always be wanting to protect them. You can’t always succeed at that, but it’s just automatic to try.

When it comes to weapons, there is no try. There is do or not do, and the best advice is to DO!

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Filed under Rules, Weapons, Safety, Grandchild Visits, Older Children, Family Gatherings, Discipline |