Pictured is Grandson #2, Michael, who graduated from high school last month and will be attending a college for the artistically gifted, which of course he is. This marks two grandchildren to make it to college, two with rather extreme artistic talents who ought to do very well in the world, and one very, very proud grandma!

We’ll be seeing Mikey and his folks and sister for the week following the 4th of July. Now this is going to be a little bit tricky, but I’m looking forward to Mikey’s complaint-less help in harvesting blackberries for the cobbler he loves so much. We are leaving this coming Saturday for Oklahoma to visit Great-Grandma, who will be 87 in August. We’ll be on our second day homeward on the 4th, and will have to swing through Kentucky on the way home to meet with other sisters, brother-in-laws, nieces and nephews to send my little sister’s ashes over Cumberland Falls, something she made us promise to do before she died a couple of years ago. It’ll be the first time we’re all together since then, and I’m really looking forward to it.

Meanshile, Mikey and family will be leaving Atlanta on the 4th to come here. I’m going to give them the ‘break-in’ secret for getting into the house if we’re not home yet (and we might not be), because we’ve been having a bit of bear trouble this year. Don’t want them camping in the yard, for very good reason.

Usually it’s copperheads that make summer risky around the homestead, and Mikey knows that because he spent his 13th birthday in the hospital from copperhead bite. Only get bears passing through spring and fall, on their way to somewhere else. We’re right in between slices of National Forest, so that is to be expected. But in late April we were visited by a 300-pound she-bear who wasn’t just into dragging the trash from the bin up and down the mountainside. She’d come right onto the porch, sidle unconcerned between the bank and the truck just feet from the front door, and refused to be scared when we yelled at her. Even loaded up the shotgun and fired it off a few times in the air hoping she’d be scared, it didn’t impress her at all.

But she finally moved on a couple of weeks ago, we thought we were in the clear until pear season. Then a 250-pound youngster decided to show up and rummage through the compost. I’m thinking he’s a teenager she’s dropped off in the bottomland, and he thinks she gifted him with our place. ARGH!!! The bear population is booming – have seen more on the back road and here than ever before. A lady in our nearby town was injured just last week in her own driveway when she tried to save her little dog who was dumb enough to get between a trash-foraging she-bear and her two cubs.

It’s gotta be because our beloved 12-year old Lucy dog died. Bears will stay away from dogs. But we aren’t anxious to adopt another so soon, though we may have no choice. At any rate the wandering and camping will be a bit constrained this season due to bears. Just as well, I think.

Happy family fun to all my readers, may you enjoy ample family, lots of fun and fireworks, and heartfelt hugs from your wonderful grandchildren!

I hope that some of my readers have clicked on the blogroll links over to the right side of this page and are passingly familiar with some of the excellent offerings there. One of those, Super Granny, is by Sally Wendkos Olds. Who really is Super Granny, and now has a a book by the same name available for us all to add to our libraries and pass on to our children when they become grandparents themselves.

The subtitle is “Great Stuff to Do with Your Grandkids,” and it’s a regular treasure trove of ideas and projects grouped ever so usefully into age ranges and includes things even the most tech-savvy kids will find to be great fun. Don’t let on to the grandkids, but some of them are even… (gasp!)… educational!

Olds’ conversational style and well-honed writing skill makes the book eminently readable, and since it graced my mailbox my older grandchildren have taken to reading it themselves for fun ideas even when this poor old granny is too busy doing paid work to get immediately involved. They set things up and then all I have to do is join in – does that make my beloveds Super Grandkids? I think so…

Of course, as the weather warms there are enough ongoing projects out in the garden, on the ridge trails and disc golf course, or even in granny’s several major projects for the year – including a nifty solar food dryer the kids are very excited about and planning to describe for their next school years’ edification – to keep them plenty busy for the next few months. Still, they’re becoming familiar with the many great resources and hints, so I’m expecting that during the big gatherings when there are 2-5 year olds here for the teenagers to entertain they’ll be pulling out Super Granny for themselves. As if the book itself qualifies by that title for their purposes!

Again, that’s Super Granny. Get yours today!

Here’s hoping that all my readers had a happy, safe and brightly-lit Independence Day this year! Ours was particularly great, with Grandson #2 (two months younger than #1), his Mom and soon-to-be official Stepdad and 15-year old sister we’ve only met once before. Other guests were at a minimum, which allowed us to just hang out together, tell stories and talk about ’stuff’, hike on the Mount Mitchell Trail a bit, and break in my brand new deck.

We hadn’t seen grandson Michael for four years, which is way too long! Last time he was here – for the 4th of July – he got bitten by a copperhead on day-1 and had to spend the next three days in the hospital. Not much of a birthday vacation! Luckily, copperheads have thus far been absent this year (knock on wood), so Mike and I were able to spend good time together picking blackberries and making cobbler, accumulating lots of thorn pricks and scratches in the process. We only looked slightly war-weary by the time the cobbler was done, badges of honor around here!

He’s grown into a fine young man (18 now). Very good-looking, with our son’s high forehead threatening to turn into Ben Franklin by the time he’s 30. Runs in the male side of my family strongly – Dad always grew one side long and brushed it over his bald pate, which is the silliest hairdo anybody ever invented! I figure Mike will brave it with a full Ben Franklin when the time comes. Or maybe imitate Grandpa, who shaves his head even though he does have more hair than anybody needs. He’s turned out sweet and thoughtful, bright and talented without our help, so I was sure to compliment Mom on her good job.

His father – our son – died when Mike was just two. It hasn’t been a very easy life for any of them, and I am once again very glad that for them things seem to have worked out well anyway. The teenagers built a lovely slip-n-slide down the garden out-terraces with plastic tarps and a hose, had a wonderful time getting themselves bruised as well as wet. They brought us some rain from Florida, which we desperately needed, then got to watch our neighbors’ big fireworks display on Saturday night from the geyser at the creek. Played several rounds of disc golf, had to pull Stepdad’s handicap early – he’s a natural!

Meanwhile, #1 grandson Jahsh who has always lived with us and has at least twice the hair anybody needs, has decided to do dreadlocks. Yet another Veteran of Foreign Hairdos, which, given his long, not-curly tresses, is a ‘do that doesn’t come easy (though he’ll look pretty darned cool). The photo up top is of him heading out for the prom in May as a pirate, nobody was surprised. His girlfriend did make a very lovely mermaid!

Jahsh and our daughter are heading to Florida later this month for an extended stay, he’ll start college in January instead of August. His father (whom we hadn’t seen in five years) did make it for graduation, and has offered him a job at his comic book/toy store. I figure it’ll do him good to learn how to work for a living, though I doubt he’s going to learn much other than how cool it is to be the boss’s son…

Which, when all is said and done, will leave my Chia-Hubby and I here all on our lonesome for our 39th anniversary in September. My sister and her husband will be moving into their log McMansion nearby next month, so we’ll have some family close by, maybe she and I will finally get down to planning that Materia Medica herbal book we’ve been planning for the last 40 years to write.

Hope that your summer is going as swimmingly as mine, that your grandchildren don’t drive you crazy, and that everyone goes forward to remember 2008 as one of the best years of their lives!

School’s out for the summer, the kids (and grandkids) are all looking for something to do. If you work at home, it’s a good idea to have some contingency plans or you’ll find that getting anything done is even more difficult than usual. I’m sure I’m not the only work-at-home Mom/Grandma who doesn’t get as much housework done as she’d like, even though she’s sitting right in the middle of the house 8 to 10 hours a day. Those dishes keep on piling up – especially when the rest of the family’s home. The food disappears faster than you can plan a meal, the television going constantly in the background is incredibly distracting, and then there’s the “I’m Bored!” whine that kids learn when they’re about 5 and don’t grow out of until they go off to college or career.

I’ve found some good resources on the web that offer good ideas. Char over at Weary Parent offers some great ideas in Keeping Teens and Tweens Busy This Summer. And while a few of them involve you having to physically be somewhere besides home, others serve to get the kids away from home instead! Don’t forget to read through the comments, there are more good ideas in those.

But this is Grandma’s House – I don’t have the luxury of signing the kids up for summer day camp because my house IS summer day camp! Younger children and teens who normally live in the city and swim in chlorinated backyard pools simply cannot be trusted to keep a real eye out for poisonous snakes, or check the depth of that creek swimming hole before diving in. So I do have to restrict activities to the yard itself and make all wood piles off limits, and insist that an adult or responsible older teen accompany all to the swimming hole or there’s no swimming allowed.

For my own sanity I’ve purchased a box of ear plugs that have come in useful for blocking out the television, and they also do double duty as whine-blockers too! I wish I’d had the money to get that newer, faster, more ‘loaded’ computer I think I deserve, which would have allowed me to donate this old one to the kids for computer games and basic email/surfing. Maybe next year. What I do have plenty of is art supplies – paper, paints, brushes, colored pencils, charcoals, clay, beads, colorful scraps of material, fabric paint, glues, glitter, felt and googly-eyes and jewelry findings and such. There’s always a project to be engaged, and one of the favorites is making refrigerator magnets. I get the magnet material in sheets, this can be cut into any shape.

Of course, kids and art supplies does equal a mess you’ll also have to clean up, though having the kids clean up after themselves is better. That way they know where all the supplies are, and the brushes still work because they’ve been washed. It won’t hurt them to learn some responsibility, and for those big enough to trust near the stove or a kitchen knife, letting them plan and produce some meals can be great fun.

Wendy Piersall at Sparkplug CEO offers more ideas than you can shake a stick at, in 94 Ways to Keep Kids Busy for the Work at Home Parent. It has age-appropriate resources and suggestions as well.

With a bit of planning the summertime visitors as well as out-of-school live-ins will have plenty to do to keep themselves busy while you’re working. And with just a bit more planning on the grocery end, even the younger children will be able to get their own snacks and even lunches together without making a big mess or interrupting your train of thought. So check out these resources and see if there aren’t some creative ways for you to maintain your own sanity while still being everybody’s favorite summer place!

Links:

Bored.com: Kids Links
Keeping Teens and Tweens Busy This Summer
94 Ways to Keep Kids Busy for the Work at Home Parent
Printable Games A to Z
Free Stuff For Kids

I don’t know about all grandmas, but I know from my own experience with other people’s kids that they often come to spend a week or two expecting to be fed precisely what they usually get fed at home, and can be positively horrified to find that Grandma doesn’t stock chocolate cereals or big bags of candy or white bread and baloney for sandwiches, and there’s not a McDonald’s or Wendy’s in sight.

Now, it’s not that I don’t make some concessions to the basic kid-diet. My non-vegetarian grands and nieces/nephews and such do have the option of a can of beef-a-roni or a frozen pepperoni pizza here and there. I’ve even been known to purchase some turkey-dogs to roast over the campfire. But the grilled burgers are black bean, there will be no “Happy Meals,” and no bacon bits for the baked potatoes.

I also stock lots of fruit, whatever’s available when they’re here. I grow strawberries in the garden, those usually get eaten as soon as they’re picked, and they only last so long into the season. I have some cherry tomatoes that went wild one year, show up in unexpected places all over the garden. Those get eaten as soon as they’re picked as well, one granddaughter swears they’re sweeter than cherries! None of the kids seem to like cooked greens very much, but they’ll eat as many peas raw from the pod as I can possibly pick on any given day.

This year I’m trying watermelons again in the garden. Haven’t had much luck with them previously, though pumpkins do just fine. These are the little ones no bigger than a cantaloupe, which I’m hoping will do better. They won’t be in until August, though, which should coincide with when the Florida niece/nephews will be here.

Thing is, I don’t think it hurts a child to understand that things at my house don’t work just the same as they do at their home. We don’t eat fast food, and don’t go out to dinner, as we live too far out in the country and don’t have that kind of money to waste on junk anyway. It’s an opportunity to introduce them to a variety of new, more healthy foods, to let them see where food actually comes from, and to allow them a new view of diet and being more conscious about WHAT they’re eating. In fact, I think that sort of thing is actually good for a child! Besides, it’s always a fun project to include the kids in menu planning as well as cooking and prep.

The toughest task I’ve found through the years (mostly friend’s kids and nieces/nephews rather than grands) is the issue of white bread versus real bread. Some of them act as if they’ve no idea that white bread actually came from wheat before it was sifted and thoroughly bleached. Or that additives to bread – like oats, flax and sesame seeds, even sprouts – won’t poison them. Yet it only takes a day or two stuck with real bread before they learn to eat it without complaint, and some even learn to like it because it makes the sandwich better!

We go through jars and jars of peanut butter when kids are here (we do that when they’re not here too, though a jar does last longer). Once they’ve been cajoled into eating that PBJ on real bread using Grandma’s homemade concord grape jam from the vines right there on the garden fence, they uniformly tell me that store-bought jam just seems like fake juice with gel in it. I don’t use the outrageous amounts of sugar most jam recipes call for, because I don’t have to. Ripe grapes produce plenty of pectin on their own, and I’m not shy of using powdered apple pectin for low-sugar recipes, available right there next to the Ball jars and lids on the grocery store shelf.

I understand that Big Medicine (and its many peripheral lobby groups and supporters) insists that there is no connection between white sugar and hyperactivity in children. I long ago came to the firm conclusion that those people don’t have children. Ask any harried Mom or Grandma, they’ll uniformly tell you there’s very much a direct link between white sugar intake and the level of hyperkinetic frenzy any single-digit midget. A 1-to-1 relationship. Moreover, any observant Mom or Grandma will also tell you that if the child has to actually digest the sugar (unrefined sugars as found in honey or fruit or molassas), it doesn’t affect them in the same way at all.

Thus I don’t deny the visiting kids sweet treats, I simply make them using alternative sweeteners like molassas, honey or dark brown sugar. Or my jam, for PBJ cookies! That way their sweet tooth gets its fix, and I don’t have kids climbing the walls all night long.

A last word of caution on this is that if you do allow your grandkids to make S’mores or roast marshmallows over the campfire, serve your evening meal early so they’ve a couple of hours to get over the sugar rush before bedtime. Otherwise, Grandma and Grandpa aren’t going to get any sleep that night.

Grandma’s Black Bean Veggieburgers
1 can black beans (or 12 oz. from dry)
1 cup rolled oats
1 large egg
1 tbsp. Worcestershire Sauce
1-2 tbsp. dark soy sauce (to taste)
1 cup chopped veggies – onions, carrots, bell peppers, zucchini or summer squash, eggplant, mushrooms, whatever
Whole wheat flour, mashed potato or flakes, or corn masa – enough to make the mixture stick together into patties

Beat the egg, add the beans and mash lightly with the other ingredients and mix well. Add enough flour or mashed potato/potato flakes to make a workable mush to form patties that don’t fall apart.

Broil 3 minutes per side or grill 2-3 minutes per side, serve on toasted buns with condiments, lettuce, spinach, sliced tomatoes, pickles, onions, etc.

And for gardening/canning grandmas out there, check out the condiment recipes over at Wise Living Journal.

Ever since I got married relatives have been sending their kids to visit during the summer when they’re out of school. First it was my little brother and sisters. When they grew up and had children, it’s been nieces and nephews too. Then it was adopted children, semi-adopted children and then their children – my grandkids. Since I’ve generally been a mostly at-home Mom and Grandma, this (wherever we’re living at the time is ‘this’) is where the kids come. We don’t mind.

Yet the visitors are mostly “city kids,” who aren’t trained and accustomed to looking out for issues here in the country that simply don’t arise in the city. Looking both ways before crossing the street, knowing how to trigger the crossing light, being wary of strangers, keeping the doors and windows locked and being in constant cell-phone distance from a parent or caregiver are all very useful skills in the city. Out here where the nearest paved road is half a mile away and nobody can “drive by” there’s other things to worry about.

The grandson who has lived here with us for 16 of his 18 years has never run into serious trouble. Grandson #2 and nephew #1 from baby sister have both had losing run-ins with copperheads, another nephew nearly broke his ankle trying to run straight down the terraces (but at least he didn’t take a nose-dive off the cliff), and we’ve installed a stop sign at the railroad crossing because we’ve always been paranoid of that. Only a few visitors ever got really lost, luckily we have very good girl-dogs who will always tell us if a kid’s in trouble, lead us right to them.

So we’ve installed some activities that will keep visiting kids close and entertained. We can’t move the swimming hole any closer (it’s about a mile), so we insist that an elder teen or adult ALWAYS accompany the young’uns – swimming hole totally off-limits until someone becomes available. We’ve also closed off the bottomland to kids, enforce it with horror stories about campers who had to go to the hospital with total-body poison ivy, whole families attacked by swarms of yellow jackets. Copperheads and timber rattlers. Even the ghosts of the prisoners who built the railroad’s great wall across the cove. You name it, we’ve tried it. Now nobody goes down there in the summer unless we make ‘em help clean out the spring.

We’ve got 10 holes of frisbee disc golf course right here on the ridge. Nephew did manage to break a total of 6 kitchen and library windows when learning how, but we’ll get those replaced eventually. With plexiglass. There are occasional snakes, but generally people playing are making enough noise for them to get out of the way. Plus, the little girl-dogs are on constant patrol, take kid-duty seriously.

We have horseshoes and badminton, a large and always in need of help garden that grows delicacies that never actually make it back to the kitchen before getting eaten. There’s the back yard campfire pit and the forest is chock full of sticks to burn. This year we’ve stocked up on boxes of Peeps, on sale the week after Easter and chunked into the freezer. If you love roasted marshmallows, you’ve just gotta try roasted Peeps!

We have a regular armory stuffed with the entire range of water weapons, from derringer to tactical nuke. Plus several gross of balloons for making grenades. We have an archery and BB range. We have an entire array of mock battle gear, your basic wooden and PVC spears and swords and battle axes and clubs covered with pipe foam and duct tape so nobody can get really hurt. And, for when worst comes to worst, we’ve got a well-stocked library room, every board game ever invented, some challenging jigsaw puzzles, cards, not one but two bar-quality dart boards and a box full of darts. We’ve a junk drawer full of dice and pick-up sticks, a DVD/VCR, and art/craft supplies galore. Daughter works at a supply store…

We also keep large supplies of mosquito repellant on hand. There’s the deep woods DEET stuff (use sparingly, it causes cancer eventually even though it prevents West Nile and Yellow Fever right now), there’s Avon Skin-So-Soft, and there’s a mint-based concoction I make and put in a mister spray jar. Here in the Appalachian forest, bug repellant is a lot more useful than sun screen (but we keep SPF 30+ in big bottles).

For the inevitable stings, bites, cuts, bends, scrapes and pokes, I stock poundage of baking soda and jars of ammonia and rubbing alcohol, industrial-size containers of your basic no-frills bandaids and bandages, 4 sizes of ace elastic bandages, some elastic joint supporters and some velcro splints.

Being well stocked and well prepared for summertime guests of the “I’m Bored!” variety is a temper-saver extraordinaire. We’ve always had to lay down some hard and fast rules for when other people’s children are here for any length of time, but that doesn’t prevent the inevitable.

What kind of supplies do readers suggest for guests in-town? Things have changed a lot since I was a kid and my parents didn’t want to know I was around unless it’s dinnertime and I’m late. The rainy weather indoor stuff would be as good, I think. Lots of scrap paper, colored pencils, waterpaints, charcoals, beads and beading supplies, various other art/crafty things, video and DVD entertainment options, board games, cards, darts, dice, etc. What do you do with kids if they can’t go outside, apart from formal activities you’ve planned for evenings and days-out (movies, out to dinner, trip to the museum, picnics, hiking excursions, swimming at the pool or lake, etc.)?

My beautiful little Sunshine seemed quite delighted to meet her Grandma (me!) over Memorial Day weekend, and Grandma was sure delighted to meet her! At just over two months old she’s fat and happy, quite mellow for a wee thing who doesn’t much like being so little. As long as she’s kept close and high enough to look big people in the eye, she’ll let loose that dazzling smile and tell stories for as long as we’ll listen to the coos and gurgles and guffaws.

My grandsons are pretty much grown (#1 just turned 18, #2 turns 18 in July), it’s a little hard to remember that they were ever that small. #1 was even smaller, just six and a half pounds when he made his appearance in the world. Miss Sunshine already understands in no uncertain terms that she is the Princess of the Universe, and fully expects deference from all to that lofty title. Which, of course, her parents, grandparents, aunts and cousins are all most eager to provide in abundance!

#1 grandson surprised me by walking out to the car when they arrived, taking the baby confidently from Mom, and proceeding with her to the house talking all the while about why he’s going to call her “CoolAss Mojo” no matter what anybody else says her name is, and imparting cousin-like advice on what the world is like and how truly cool it is. It reminded me of the fact that my husband and I were just 18 when our daughter was born, and I had to realize that it probably won’t be too long before I get to welcome a GREAT-grandchild into the family. Whoa!!!

I did manage to finish that quilt finally. It wasn’t as big as I’d have liked, so I batted it double-thick and used pink fleece on the back side to compliment the purple I used around the squares on the front (because I started it before I knew Sunshine was a she, and purple is what I had on hand). Daughter was very pleased, and that’s what counts.

With gas prices going up fast we may not see them again for awhile. We’d go north to see them, but must go west to visit Mom-in-Law this summer instead – if we can afford even that. She’ll be 86 in August, the only parent we’ve got left, and we’ve got to make some arrangements so she won’t be living alone. Grandson #2 will be coming up to see us in July (and will hopefully NOT tangle with a copperhead this time), and #1 is going to have to go to the local community college at least his first year because costs at the university have doubled since he applied.

Perhaps things economic will get better soon. Despite being old enough to get jaded, new life always tends to make things look a lot more hopeful. All I know right now is that Little Miss Sunshine is sure happy to be here, and Grandma is sure happy to meet her!

We’re all suffering Blackberry Winter here in the mountains. And I do mean suffering. Grandson, daughter and I have all contracted our ‘usual’ spring colds due to radical temperature and weather shifts, and it’s simply way too cold and nasty outside for me to finish tilling a tier of the garden for tomatoes and peppers. We haven’t seen the sun in days. It’s not quite cold enough for heat, not warm enough to get out of our winter sweatshirts and sweaters. Yuck!

I found out about Blackberry Winter the first spring we spent here, in 1993. That was the year of the Great Blizzard on March 13 that buried us under 3-4 feet of wet snow and cut the electricity off for two full weeks. It was also the year of our first forest fire on April 13, exactly a month later and pretty scary (I’m used to them by now). Then, right around May 13, the lovely seasonably warm weather turned suddenly dark, damp and relatively cold (low 60s during the day, 40s at night). It lasted for nearly two weeks, and I was hard pressed to figure out what’s wrong with May around here. I’d seen May be the hottest month of the year in several states we’d lived previously!

That’s when my new friend Margaret informed me rather dismissively that it’s just Blackberry Winter. Happens every year during the first half of May, she said, and in the 15 years since I’ve found that to be true and entirely predictable every single year. See, the blackberries bloom during that time, and the cold weather always coincides with the appearance of their white blooms. Not with the crocus and jonquils, not with the dogwoods and redbuds, not with the apples, pears or cherry blooms. Always with the blackberries. As soon as you see the buds starting to open you know for a fact the weather will turn within a day or two, and stay dismal for as long as it takes for them to be pollinated and drop off.

Thus it was with joy and gladness that I received the news in my head-stuffed, achy spring illness that our daughter and son-in-law will be visiting Granny, Grandpa and an Aunt Granny nearby next weekend with baby Sunshine! Of course that means I have to scramble to finish that darned quilt, but I can’t wait to hold that baby and kiss her soft cheeks! The weather should be great by then, the blackberries are almost done doing their thing. Our colds should be well over with by then too, and we’ll disinfect the house thoroughly for the occasion.

I’ll take lots of pictures! So stay tuned all you Moms and Grandmas out there, this Grandma is ready to show off big time!

It was an action-packed weekend. A total of 4 daughters (one by birth, three by stray whose kids call me “Aunt Granny”) one stray son and five semi-grands plus #1 grandson. Here for the youngest semi-grandson’s eighth birthday on Sunday. To make matters worse, the weather was absolutely dismal so there could be no friendly campfire for Peep-roasting, the ins and outs of having all those people coming and going from the cold and wet into the house completely trashed the place so that it’s taken two days just to reclaim the living area.

There were some issues that arose, particularly in regards to the younger boys (8 and 10) and 17-year old #1 grandson’s ample collection of serious weaponry that he just can’t seem to keep put safely away because he practices with them so often. I had to collect ninja knives and Samurai swords, one rapier and several heavy fantasy swords from them at various times, which they’d managed to fish out of some gawd-awful corner of grandson’s outrageously messy room when nobody was looking. The girls (4 and 14) were, as usual, perfect angels – ratted out those boys every time…

#1 Grandson lives here, graduates high school this year, and is an only child. This place is far out in the country with no immediate neighbors, surrounded by National Forest. When he was younger (about 8), we began allowing him to collect wooden practice swords and staffs, gave him form lessons to keep him busy. Our son (who died when grandson was just 2) had a double black belt in a weapons form of Kung-Fu (was also an amazing juggler and seasoned performer who once toured demonstrating his weapons skills on stage with his master). Grandson had inherited a lot of practice and show weapons, bought more once we allowed that beginning when he was 12. He makes spectacularly detailed Samurai armor by hand too, as well as fantasy chess sets from Sculpy – he’s extremely talented, we’ve always encouraged it.

He orders the swords and knives through a mail order company that sends him a catalog every 3 months, and he has amassed quite the collection. We’ve also allowed long bow and crossbow for target practice, and he’s very good at it. The problem is that he doesn’t always put his weapons safely away. When it’s just him it’s not a problem. When there’s little ones present, it IS a problem.

Now, I don’t mind if the younger boys target practice with the long bows. There’s a full dirt-bank target, and so long as there aren’t other kids or dogs in the area, they can’t hurt anything. There’s usually adults or elder grandson around to help keep them in line. The 10-year old has phenomenal aim, has his own bow and a straw target in his own yard and practices regularly. We’ve never allowed play guns that aren’t SuperSoakers or Nerf. No knife fights or sword fights using real weapons. There are well padded PVC and duct tape practice staffs and swords they can hit each other with all day and never leave a bruise.

But because elder grandson didn’t even try to get all his real weapons stashed where the kids couldn’t get them this past weekend, I’ve laid down the law. Summer’s coming, there will be lots of young-uns in and out, he graduates (and has his 18th birthday) in May, and while I understand his teenage distraction and inattention to detail, that distraction is WHY I’m laying down the law.

ALL of the metal weapons must be boxed atop the closet in the shed, where the unicycles, puppets and various impressive implements of snake-death are hung in rafters, in the building where we store the DR brush mower, the super Craftsman tiller, the chainsaws and chains, axes, mauls, pitchforks and other sharp implements that are necessary to keeping the land and crops. When (if?) he ever gets a place of his own, he can use them as steak knives for all I care. But since he’s going to college just 20 miles away, he’ll still be here for awhile. Besides, if he were living on-campus they’d never allow those weapons anyway.

He’s sulking, of course. “It’s so unfair!” he whines, knowing deep down that it’s his own fault. Being responsible with his weapons is a good lesson to learn, as well as remembering that he’s not the only grandkid we’ve got. He is much older than the rest of the brood, will be voting this year! That makes him a legal adult for most purposes, and despite all the distractions he very much needs to pay attention to these things.

Nobody’s perfect. That’s why being a parent and grandparent can still be such a challenge well after that kid gets to be a foot taller than you! The teenage brain is stuck somewhere between childhood and adult, there is still work to do. And, just to add to the observations from this end of the spectrum, they never really do grow up. They’ll always be your babies, so you’ll always be wanting to protect them. You can’t always succeed at that, but it’s just automatic to try.

When it comes to weapons, there is no try. There is do or not do, and the best advice is to DO!

11. Teach Your Grandchild Something Cool

When you have your grandchild for a day or a few days, try to get them interested in some skill or knowledge that you have, which he or she might be willing to learn. My daughter sniffed at sewing because I sewed – said she didn’t have to learn. But #1 grandson is quite the sew-er (seamster?), makes many of his own fashionable accessories (including a kilt and leather armor, all his halloween costumes) and does his own alterations. I taught him the basics, help him pattern, he enjoys doing the work.

If your grandchild is artistically inclined, have art supplies handy. If s/he’s a budding actor, encourage it. There are interests you as grandma can indulge and help to develop, and children need to know someone’s interested in what they can do.

12. Let the Grandkids Help With Meals

When our grandchildren are here with us I like to get their daily input on what’s for lunch and dinner. Sure, they sometimes think up something awful, but it’s an opportunity to get to know what they like and don’t like, what combinations most appeal to them. I’ve tons of cookbooks with great illustrations, and a big garden that’s usually got fresh produce incoming when they’re here. Except for strawberries and cherry tomatoes, most makes it into the kitchen before being eaten.

If we’ve picked a bunch of tomatoes, I get out the tomato recipes and let them decide. It’s usually Granny’s Famous ‘Mater Pie. We chunk up the variety veggies and marinate for kabobs. They’re expert ‘tater and corncob foil-wrappers, and will eat as much of everything cooked in or over the fire as they can fit in their stomachs.

13. Have Them Help You Read the Fine Print

When your grandchild learns to read, one fun exercise is to take him or her grocery shopping with you and teach them about scrutinizing food labels. They get to practice their reading skills, and learn something about what’s really in the stuff they’re eating.

My general rule is if you can’t pronounce it, you probably shouldn’t be eating it. Keep going through the brands until you find one that doesn’t have all those unpronounceable chemicals and preservatives in it, chances are your grandchild will decide very firmly that it tastes much better than that ‘other’ brand.


14. Let Them Make the Drinks Too

I have the simplest lemonade recipe on the planet – a cup of bottled lemon juice and a cup of sugar in two quarts of water. It’s hard to mess up, so I usually let the grandchild make it first thing in the morning, drink all day. Pick up some fresh lemons, limes or oranges and let them squeeze the juice. Let them help you harvest some fresh mint for mint tea, or work the juicer with the morning’s garden haul for homemade V-8.

You might be amazed at what healthy drinks and snacks your grandchildren will eagerly consume if they get to help concoct them. And you won’t get a reputation as the “junk-food granny.”

15. Encourage Physical Activity

If your grandchild is born in a city like mine were, you know that social conditions no longer encourage kids to spend time outdoors doing physical things. Too much danger out there, too little to do. If you live in a rural environment as we do, or can plan to go rural when the grandkids are with you for visits, keep them moving!

Go hiking or bike riding, visit museums or exhibits they’ll enjoy. Go camping or swimming, take up frisbee golf or horseshoes or badminton. Play kick the can or capture the flag at dusk, or even a friendly game of tag. Every bit of exercise you can engage in with the grandchildren is exercise that will help you too!

These are fun tips about how a new grandma can build a relationship with her grandchild/grandchildren that’s unique and valued. When babies are new some plain old mom-knowledge is most useful, some TLC to the new mom and dad too. Cook some meals, stay with the cranky baby while they take a walk to earn calm. Babies are not babies for very long, and before you know it they’re full-fledged kids with more energy than any adult, and an insatiable curiosity that seeks stimulation.

In the end, the very, very best thing about grandchildren is that you as grandma can give them back to their parents for the hard work and worry. Your main job is to enjoy them!

Posts to This Series:
Part 1: Tips 1 – 5
Part 2: Tips 6 – 10
Part 3: Tips 11 – 15